


Another Day in Paradise

by MissGuenever



Series: Extra Cargo [3]
Category: Firefly
Genre: Crew as Family, Family, Gen, Hangover, Outer Space, Tooth-Rotting Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-18
Updated: 2020-06-17
Packaged: 2021-03-02 04:41:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,759
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23719876
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MissGuenever/pseuds/MissGuenever
Summary: It's just another day in paradise. This takes place in my Extra Cargo 'verse and involves large boots, small prayers, loose shoelaces, and china dolls. In short: fluff with a side of parental desires and Mal's backstory. It does help to read the first part of "Extra Cargo" and "When She Was Good" first.
Series: Extra Cargo [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1475975
Comments: 1
Kudos: 8





	1. Another Day in Paradise

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you everyone for the continued support. This has been a really hard fic to write; and I’m not sure why. Right now it looks like it will be three fairly short chapters; might stretch to four depending on how the characters cooperate. **Gaben** , thank you as always for being a great beta. 
> 
> Translations are at the end.

It was another day on board Serenity; another day… One which, had started out with Caroline actually eating her breakfast with no complaints, well almost no complaints. This was actually no surprise; she’d gone to bed without dinner the night before. The Cap’n had sent her to bed after she’d thrown a tantrum about doing her chores, which meant wiping the table before dinner and setting the table; but she’d really wanted to go and play jacks with River and Kaylee.

So this morning she’d trundled into the common area wearing Jayne’s old orange t-shirt and was slurping down her porridge only muttering a few complaining words. “Shiong mao niao. _Panda Piss_.”

“Language,” Kaylee said tiredly. She’d been up most of the night before reading a dime novel she’d gotten the day before between junkyards on Hillard.

“But…”

“No buts… Don’ really care if it tastes like fay-fay duh pee yen, a _baboon’s asshole_ , yer eatin’ it; nian qing de, young one.” Jayne grumped as he stomped in to the common area and grabbed a bowl of the gray slop slouching back to his bunk with a gorram hangover. He’d had a little too much fun on Hillard last night. Gotten a piece of trim… A might nice piece of pi gu, _ass_!

Kaylee did a double take. Out of everyone on board Serenity Jayne was usually the most tolerant and amused with Caroline’s antics. Something had all of his panties in a twist this morning. A smirk crossed over her face as she watched him make a beeline to the coffee. He’d gotten in last night after she’d gone to bed, so he must’ve had a good time; probably a little too much of a good time.

Simon came in the door looking for Kaylee; it really made his morning seeing the mechanic eating breakfast with the Captain’s daughter each morning. It still confounded him something fierce that Captain Malcolm Reynolds, Browncoat and rebel had a daughter! What was even more confusing was the care and love he and everyone showed towards the pian zhe de, _stubborn little girl_. She was just like her ba! “Morning Kaylee.”

Kaylee looked up at the surgeon with her big brown eyes, “Mornin’ Doc. How’d you sleep?”

“Fine and you?” Even after all this time on the ship and the pretty mechanic still made him go all tongue-tied. 

“Good.” She jerked her head over to where Jayne was sucking down a cup of coffee in between large bites of porridge. “Looks like he got in a little late.”

The doc looked over at the big merc and nodded agreement. “Looks like he’s wishing he had some tóufǎ de gǒu, _hair of the dog_.”

“What’s hair of the dog?” Caroline looked up from slurping up her porridge.

“Uhh…” Simon stammered “It’s when… ummm… You don’t get enough sleep.”

Kaylee jumped into try and save Simon, or perhaps Caroline, from a long winded medical explanation “It’s for mornings when you don’t get enough sleep and need coffee strong enough for a dog’s hair to stand up on end.”

“Yeah,” Simon poured himself a cup of coffee and refilled Kaylee’s. “I need some hair of the dog too; stayed up too long talking last night.”

She nodded in agreement; she’d had mornings like Jayne was having. And after their conversation a few weeks ago when Simon had told her about that time when his daddy had to bail him out when he’d made surgeon – she knew that he understood, hair of the dog.

After sharing a look with the Doc, Serenity’s mechanic looked over at the Caroline who was still eating her porridge with, if not gusto, at least not grudgingly. “Good girl, you doin’ lessons today?”

“Uh huh.” She mumbled around the last bite of yu ben de, _stupid_ , porridge. Caroline knew better than to talk with her mouth full; prissy ass doc gave her all kinds of dirty looks and Miss ‘Nara told her not to talk with her mouthful. She swallowed her porridge “Numbers with Wash; then readin’ with the preacher, and tea with Lǎoshī Inara.”

“Shia, _yeah_. That sounds like a fun day.”

“Especially playin’ later.” The little girl dumped her bowl and spoon in the sink and bounced off to get her hair brushed. “I like playin’”

Jayne finished his second cup of coffee and poured a third before moving mostly upright back towards his bunk. “Ching-wah tsao duh liou mahng! _Frog-Humping Son of a Bitch!_ ”

“Jayne!” Kaylee looked up from where she’d started reading her book again.

“Stubbed my gorram toe on the ai ya, _damn_ , hatch!” Jayne’s toe felt like his head; about ready to explode.

“Bun tyen-shung duh ee-dway-ro. _Stupid inbred stack of meat_.” Simon muttered under his breath as he walked towards the medical bay; Jayne’s crudeness was always amazing. Realizing what he’d called the big man, the Doc groaned; too much time in the black and the merc’s crudeness was wearing off on him.

Simon shook his head as he passed Mal. The Captain arched his eyebrow at the surgeon’s muttered words; and wondered what had happened now. It prolly wasn’t Caroline; she didn’t usually get called a stupid inbred stack of meat. There were plenty of other things that got muttered after she left epic messes around the ship; many of them involving supplies from the infirmary. Even before the whole spider-web incident she’d been forbidden from going into the infirmary.

Continuing his walk towards the common area, Mal saw his mercenary and put the pieces together: The coffee on his shirt, the blood-shot eyes, and the limp. Yep, Jayne had one heck of a hangover, stubbed his toe on the threshold, and spilled his coffee. And then he’d started cursing; probably something quite crude which made Simon turn back into a prissy-ass core surgeon. Continuing to walk he could hear the preacher’s soft voice as he went through his morning ablutions.

> “… if they lead to salvation; give us the grace of manifesting that we are children of light and day, and heirs to your eternal reward. In the abundance of your mercies, O Lord…”

Mal kept moving out of earshot of Shepard Book’s prayers. He used to say them in the common area, but that was like a train station in the morning; too many people moving in and out for him to meditate in peace. Mal reached the coffee urn and poured his second cup of caffeinated love; and noticed the bowl and spoon in the sink. “The _nian qing de_ , young one, didn’t give you any problems this morning?” He gestured at the sink when Kaylee looked up from her book.

“Nope, she was hungry.”

Mal chuckled while slurping his coffee; he remembered many mornings like this when he was a kid. Waking up starving because ma had sent him to bed for cussing at the dinner table, skippin’ out on chores iffn’ he didn’t think the animals shouldn’t eat; than he shouldn’t eat neither, or something else. Finishing his first cup of coffee he poured another and washed Caroline’s bowl and spoon putting them away. “Do good today.” He pointed the cup at his mechanic and walked out to go run the errands he needed before they took off for the black.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Translations are at the end.

Four hours later Mal drove the mule back into the cargo bay. He’d gotten most of the supplies they needed for the next couple weeks and surveilled where he was going to meet Lou Hiao tong. Not ideal; but, they’d had a lot worse. Had better too; but, that was neither here nor there. Dismounting from the mule, he grabbed a bag of food he’d traded for, and a few other necessities he’d used precious coin for. Hopefully, this deal would give them coin; barter worked well most of the time; but, coin worked well all the time. Well, except with some of the hill people out on the rim planets.

It was suspiciously quiet on Serenity when Mal turned the engine off the mule. Usually there was a hum of activity. All he could hear was low rumbling of voices coming from what sounded like common area or the medical bay. “Shun shen duh gao wahn. _Holy testicle Tuesday_.” He rolled his eyes at the heavens. What now? Usually quiet like this meant all hell was going break loose. It could be anything from Serenity’s engine being on the verge of blowing up; River, well… being River; Caroline scheming; or something far more drastic! 

Keeping a hold on the bag, Mal rushed up the ladderwell towards the crew areas: The medical bay, common area, and berthing. Everything was quiet until he reached the common area where he found Kaylee and Inara holding Caroline and singing quietly to her. He dropped the bag on table startling Inara who looked up at him. Jayne was sitting at the table holding what looked like a cup of cold coffee and just staring at tableau in front of him. “What happened?”

“Damn it Mal!” Jayne blurted in a hushed voice, spilling some coffee as he jerked around to look at the Captain. “I’s didn’t see you.”

“What happened?” Mal asked again, he could see dusty tear tracks on Caroline’s face and all he wanted to do was rush over to her; but Inara was waving him off. He looked again and saw that Caroline was sleeping.

“She done fell.” Jayne’s hand shook as he took a slurp of coffee. “She done fell and I couldn’t gorram catch her.”

Book, who was sitting quietly by the big merc interjected. “Jayne, it wasn’t your fault. Captain, Caroline is fine.” He laid a hand on Jayne’s arm and turned towards the Captain not wanting emotions to spool up any further. He could see Mal’s instincts warring with themselves; the need to go to his daughter; and the need to find out what happened. 

“Fine?” Mal’s eyes widened at the definition of fine.

“Mal,” Book spoke firmly rising and getting a cup of coffee for the Captain. “Sit. She’s sleeping now. Don’t wake her.”

Mal rounded on the duo at the table. “What in the gorram hell happened?” 

“Sit.” Book ordered, his tone broaching no disobedience. “Jayne was lifting weights in the cargo bay, and Caroline had finished the first part of her lessons and needed to burn off some energy.”

Serenity’s Captain waved his hand impatiently; this was all pretty normal. There wasn’t a force in all the ‘verse that would have his active seven year old nǚ hair, _daughter_ , sit and do lessons for an entire morning. So they’d worked out a system: Lesson, running time, lesson, play time, and so on until everything was done.

“She came running into the cargo bay;” Book gestured towards the ceiling to indicate the catwalks. “And as always ran down the stairs as fast as she could towards her Jayne.”

Mal smiled wryly at the comment; ‘her Jayne’ while looking longingly at his daughter being cuddled by Kaylee and Inara. She looked so peaceful, so different than when she’d first come on board. She was filling out; no longer on the verge of malnutrition that Simon had declared a couple days ago when he’d managed to get somewhat of an exam in. Well, after a giant crying fit, a couple of smacks to her butt, and the threat of getting her mouth washed out with soap after she cussed the doc six ways to Sunday.

All he really wanted to do was hold her, cuddle her, and make sure she knew that everything was okay, and that it would be okay. But, that wasn’t where he was needed at the moment. “Tai-kong suo-yo duh shing-chiou sai-jin wuh duh pee-goo, _shove all the planets in the universe up my ass_.” He muttered to himself and rushed over to where the mechanic and companion were cuddling the sleeping child.

“Is she okay?” Mal asked, only a touch of franticness coming out in his voice.

“She’s fine now.” Inara looked up the Captain, while she reached out to put a comforting hand on his arm. Her movement jostled Caroline a little and she moaned in her sleep burrowing more deeply into their arms.

Kaylee scooted over on the long seating area so that Mal could hold his daughter. “You should probably take her back to your berth,” she whispered.

“Mmm… Hmmm.” Mal was carefully looking over Caroline. There was nothing but the cut on her head carefully held together with neat little pieces of tape, scrapes on her hands, and dried blood on her lip.

“She broke a tooth too.” Kaylee added standing up and watching her Captain examine every inch of his daughter, gently. Gently so that he wouldn’t wake her up. 

“I examined her very carefully.” Simon added having walked in to see the tableau unfolding in front of him. “I took her upper central incisor. Her adult tooth is beginning to erupt and she would have lost it within the next three weeks anyway.” He looked over at the mechanic who was smiling at him. “Kaylee insisted that we keep it.”

“Yes, for the tooth fairy.” 

Shepard Book reached into his pocket and carefully pulled out the gauze wrapped tissue. “I have the tooth.”

Inara nodded “I was going to go out and get the nian qing de, _young one_ , a treat so that she would know the tooth fairy came in the morning.”

“Can I go with her?” Kaylee asked, always eager for a trip planetside.

“Mmm… Hmmm…” Mal mumbled as he gathered Caroline into his arms and awkwardly stood up.

“My examination also revealed that she will be losing her lower central incisor soon, and possibly her lower lateral incisor.”

“Oooh… Shiny!” Kaylee’s face showed her excitement as she looked at Inara, “We need to get three little treats.”

“Get her a doll.” Jayne added gruffly tossing a couple of credits to Kaylee. When she looked at him strangely he ducked his head and stared at his coffee cup. “Mah little sister always liked them china dolls in the gorram fou fou dresses.” 

Safely standing up Mal had Caroline draped across his shoulder, she was as limp as the stuffed bunny he’d had when he was a kid; right around Caroline’s age.

“Captain, I gave her a light sedative.” Simon fluttered his hands nervously, he really wasn’t used to seeing everyone like this. When Shepard Book had been shot, heck even when he’d been shot it had been a lot calmer. 

“Mmm…” Mal stepped out into the passageway on the way to his cabin.

“I thought that it would be good to give her a thorough examination while she was asleep.”

The Shepard put his hand on the trauma surgeon’s shoulder. “Simon he’s not paying attention right now to anything but Caroline.”

Together they stood and watched as the father and daughter made their way slowly towards his berthing unit.

As they all watched Mal walk down the passageway towards his cabin with Caroline gently held in his arms, Wash came in from dropping off a package to the post. “Why does the Cap’n look like he gun hoe-tze bee dio-se? 

“Sshh…” came from both the mechanic and companion. “You’ll wake her.”

“Huh?” The pilot looked to the Shepard and Jayne for explanation. They both gave him ‘later’ looks. Wash sighed and kept walking up to the cockpit.  
Kaylee gave him a dirty look as she went to wash up “Jen mei nai-shing duh fwo-tzoo! _Extraordinarily Impatient Buddha_! She muttered under her breath.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 5 - He gun hoe-tze bee dio-se -- Have a shit throwing contest with a monkey (Wash)  
> 6 - Jen mei nai-shing duh fwo-tzoo! -- Extraordinarily Impatient Buddha! (Kaylee)  
> Nǚ hair – Daughter  
> 7 - Shun shen duh gao wahn -- Holy testicle Tuesday (Mal)  
> 8 - Tai-kong suo-yo duh shing-chiou sai-jin wuh duh pee-goo -- Shove All the Planets in the Universe Up my Ass (Mal)


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Gaben** , and **RionaEire** you two rock! This was a really hard story for me to write. And I’m not sure why; but, I finished it and hope you enjoyed it. Gaben, thank you for being an awesome beta!

Mal laid his daughter down carefully in her cheerfully painted bunk; she looked like an angel with her short crop of hair spread out around her head like a halo. He gently brushed an errant lock of hair off her face and kissed her on the forehead, carefully pushing Zoe in under her arm and tucking her into her very pink castle.

Caroline had given him quite a scare today. Gao yang jong duh goo yang! Motherless Goats of All Motherless Goats! Giu! Hell! She’d given them all a scare today. In many ways Mal was glad he’d actually been off-ship when she’d fallen; he wasn’t sure that he coulda taken the shock. At the same time he wished that he could have been there to hold her while she cried. But, now she was sleeping; and Simon had assured him that when she woke up there wouldn’t be much pain. Her mouth was healthy, and her teeth were healthy. There were a couple of small cavities; but, they were in baby-teeth that would be coming out soon. Mal could tell that Simon had been wishing he’d been a dentist and could fill the cavities; but, there wasn’t much he could do about that. 

Simon had started talking about how much worse Caroline’s tumble down the stairs could have been; and when both Mal and Jayne started turning white. Kaylee jumped in with how lucky they’d been. And that she must have had an tiānshǐ, angel, looking over her. And wasn’t it just shiny that the Doc could do a dental exam too! Inara hopped in to the conversation trying to sound enthusiastic about the good that came of the day’s events. After all, they’d all see how much the little girl hated anything to do with the medical bay. Jayne was still looking a little peaked; but, even he had a bite mark from Caroline trying to escape Simon when he’d tried to examine her a couple days earlier. Yeah, anything medical related made his daughter turn into a hellion!

So now Mal sat here in his berth’s silence, humming a wordless tune his mother had hummed when he’d been little. “Mmmm, mmmm, hmmm.” The melody brought him back to when he’d been about Caroline’s age, maybe a little older; but, not much. It had been summer; he could remember that because it was so hot the men in the fields were working without shirts.

_“Ma, Ma, Ma!’_

_“What, Malcolm? I’m right here, you don’t have ta’ yell.”_

_“Can I go swimming with the Larsen’s and Pieter?”_

_“Yer chores done?”_

_“Yes ‘m” Mal nodded vigorously, he really wanted to up to the swimming hole._

_“Be back before supper.”_

_Mal turned to sprint towards where the boys were waiting for him until he heard his ma yell something else. “And iffn you hear thunder;r you all best come back now. I’m not likin’ the look of that sky.”_

_“Yep! We’ll be back for supper. Love ya ma!” Mal waved as the four boys all ran off together._

Looking over at his still sleeping daughter, Mal thought about the similarities between that day and this one. He stared at the angelic expression on Caroline’s and fingered the scar on his own head. Yeah, that day had been a lot like this day; started off quiet, and ended up like da-shiang bao-tza shr duh lah doo-tze! The Explosive Diarrhea of an Elephant!

Kaylee and the rest of the crew had told him all about the good morning they’d been having. Breakfast got et; first set of lessons got did; and they’re was all kinds of mischief being made in the sun on the ramp when the Shepard had said that they’d better do some more lessons before lunch. 

Yeah, that was pretty much what ma had said that morning, and every morning when Mal had wanted to go off and do fun stuff. “Yer chores done?”

_Running through the fields with the boys was one of Mal’s favorite things to do! Especially when they started trading insults._

_“You’re the liou coe shway duh biao-tze huh hoe-tze duh ur-tze! You’re the stupid Son of a Drooling Whore and a Monkey” Pieter threw out to start the daily battle._

_“Ching-wah tsao duh liou mahng! Frog-Humping Son of a Bitch!” One of the Larsen’s threw out; Mal never bothered to try and tell them apart. It wasn’t like they were ever apart._

_“Bun tyen-shung duh ee-dway-ro! Stupid Inbred Stack of Meat!” The other Larsen tossed out as he clambered over a rock and around a tree that led to the entrance to the old quarry that was now full of water._

_Reaching the top of the hill Mal stripped off his shirt while running and hurled himself over the edge “Last one in is a huh choo-shung tza-jiao duh tzang-huo! Last one in is a filthy fornicator of Livestock!”_

_Of course had any of their parents heard the language pouring out their mouths, they would have been dragged home and had had their mouth washed out with the joo fuen chse; pigs droppings,that old man Cheng sold for soap. But that was the best thing about being a boy, and having free-run of their little section of Shadow afternoon!_

_Laughing the three other boys followed him up the rocky hill to the old quarry. Most of Shadow was flat; but, there were a couple of hills. And they pretty much were all on mineral or stone deposits. This one which was adjacent to the Reynold’s ranch was stone. A nifty type of stone that the teachers at school blabbed on and on and on about! None of the boys gave a fay-fay duh pee yen, a baboon’s asshole about the geology. But, they did care that the hill was tree covered with just enough underbrush to let them play Alliance and Rebels! And the best part was that the quarry itself had mostly filled with water over the years and even on the hottest days the water was cool._

_The boys quickly stripped down. The Larsen twin quickly dumped all their clothes into a heap and leaped from the ledge into the water below. Pieter stayed in his tattered under shorts, not wanting to listen to taunts about their shrinking, yīnjīng, once the frigid water hit his body._

_"Hey, Mal you too delicate ta go in buck," teased one of the Larsen’s having realized that all Mal had taken off was his shirt. None of them had worn shoes up here; it was summer, shoes were for winter. And they were expensive, better stuff to spend coinage on then shoes no one needed._

_“Yep, all kinds of a mama’s boy.” The other one chimed in, a chorus… As usual._

_Mal dropped straight down into the water he’d just climbed out of and bobbed up next to his friends, “Nah, jist don’t wan’ my junk bein’ mistaking for a pea.” He laughed as he dunked the Larsen closest to him; Johann he thought._

_Johann, or Maxim came back to the surface spitting water like a fountain into the sky._

_“Come on in Pieter!” Malcolm yelled at his friend._

_“Are you scared?” Shouted the twins._

_“Scared like a nǚhái, girl!” Taunted Malcolm while he treaded water._

_Pieter cannonballed into the center of boys yelling at the top of his lungs the whole way down. “Damn this water is cold enough to freeze the tits off a cow!” he exclaimed as he bobbed back to the surface of the quarry.  
The cold water was a relief against Shadow’s strong summer sun. The boys spent a bunch of time paddling around the big pit and jumping off the ledge at the edge of the trail. Playing silly games, laughing, and generally enjoying their free time. Summer was busy for the ranches on Shadow so the four boys didn’t get a lot of time to be together._

_They played games like How Joh Bu Jian; where the player in the middle had to close their eyes and try and grab the players splashing around you. But, the catch was that you could only capture your opponent underwater._

_"Shee-niou, cow sucking..." Yelped Pieter when Maxim scared the go shi out of him._

_Maxim grabbed his friend by his legs and yanked him hard under the cool water, then, " Go tsao de, dog fucker," spluttered Pieter as his head burst out of the water._

_The boys were having a blast, splashing and trying to see who could be the crudest. No one really had an edge; because, they all lived on and around ranches. And the ranch hands, especially the old ones, could make even the most hardened whore blush._

Mal leaned forward in his chair when Caroline mumbled in her sleep, and rubbed her arm gently to let her know that he was there. She reflexively grabbed his hand, and he just stared at how small her fingers were next to his and settled back into a comfortable position. He shook his head at how tough the four of them had been that summer when they were seven.

There was a lot of kicking and splashing and squealing for quite a while; interesting expletives were exchanged; dares were tossed around. And town gossip was exchanged: How Johann and Maxim had seen Ming making out with their older brother Dirck. 

Then the dare came up. The dare to jump off the high ledge. The ledge that only the teenagers jumped off. The ledge that you had to jump over the rock slide into the quarry. 

Looking back, Mal thought it was Pieter that had tossed the dare out there; but, it could have been Johann. He was pretty sure that it wasn’t Maxim. Thinking about it now, that just wasn’t the type of thing Maxim would do. Nah… It had to have been Maxim that tossed the dare; and Malcolm was the only one brave enough to take it at the ripe old age of seven.

With all the bravado and determination he could muster, Mal climbed out of the water and walked up the trail towards the ledge that they usually jumped off, it was only about six feet above the water. Pieter, Johann, and Maxim’s taunts followed him up the path he kept walking past the ledge with only a small pause and a little bit of trepidation in his step. He reached the ledge where the teenage boys all dared each other to jump from. It was about twenty feet above the water; and you had to make sure you jumped out about five feet towards the center to miss some jagged rocks just above the water line. 

_“Shun shen duh gao wahn! Holy testicle Tuesday!” Mal whispered to himself as he stared down at the quarry waters where Pieter, Maxim and Johann were swimming and splashing. “That’s a long way down.”_

_The water looked like it was a mile away, and the rocks looked like jagged teeth!_

_“Come on! What are you a jī, chicken?” Pieter yelled up at Mal_

_“Yeah, hurry up!” The twins shouted and then started crowing like chickens and trying to flap their arms while treading water._

_“Wuh duh ma huh tah duh fong kwong duh wai shung! Holy Mother of God and All Her Wacky Nephews!” Mal whispered to himself before yelling out “Here goes nuthin!’_

_He grabbed his nose and with a giant leap he flew off the ledge to the sounds of guys in the water shouting “Yeah!” and “Whoot!”_

_Mal shook his head as he remembered that day; well, as he didn’t really remember the next few hours after the dive. And honestly, he really didn’t remember the few minutes before the dive either; the doc said that was pretty common. Caroline moved in her sleep and moaned a little and he reached over and stroked her hair humming gently until she quieted back down. Looking back all those years ago; he’d really been young, dumb, and foolish!_

_There really wasn’t much he remembered from the rest of that day. He’d woken up to the doc talkin’ to his ma. Mal had heard a few words here and there; he remembered ‘lucky,’ ‘scar,’ and a couple other random words. He hadn’t felt so lucky the next morning when he’d woken up again and gotten one heck of a tongue lashing from his mother. But, at least she felt that the gash on his head; and his mild concussion was punishment enough for being a yú, foolish, boy!_

Gently rubbing Caroline’s arm; which she usually found comforting, Mal felt pretty much the same way. He’d yell at her tomorrow for running without her shoelaces tied; but, for now he was just relieved that she was fine, and it wasn't a twenty foot cliff that she'd decided to jump from. Though, if she’d slipped under the railing on the mezzanine, the long drop to the loading bay would have been worse. Yup, he was going ta be doin some yellin' alright.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, I did it: Used it all fifteen words that toplessrobot.com said were the most creative in the Firefly ‘verse. Yeah! And thanks to Gaben for helping me get words fourteen and fifteen in. So, now that you’ve read this glorious piece of work. Go forth and read my other awesome stories!
> 
> Giu – Hell  
> Jī -- Chicken  
> Joo fuen chs -- Pigs droppings  
> Nǚhái -- Girl  
> Tiānshǐ – Angel  
> Yú – Foolish (stupid)  
> 9 - Gao yang jong duh goo yang -- Motherless Goats of All Motherless Goats  
> 10 - Da-shiang bao-tza shr duh lah doo-tze -- The Explosive Diarrhea of an Elephant (Mal)  
> 11 - Liou coe shway duh biao-tze huh hoe-tze duh ur-tze -- Stupid Son of a Drooling Whore and a Monkey  
> 2 - Ching-wah tsao duh liou mahng! Frog-Humping Son of a Bitch! (Repeat)  
> 1 - Bun tyen-shung duh ee-dway-ro. Stupid Inbred Stack of Meat (Repeat)  
> 12 - Huh choo-shung tza-jiao duh tzang-huo -- Filthy Fornicators of Livestock (Mal)  
> 3 - Fay-fay duh pee yen -- A baboon’s asshole  
> 7 - Shun shen duh gao wahn -- Holy testicle Tuesday (Repeat)  
> 13 - Wuh duh ma huh tah duh fong kwong duh wai shung -- Holy Mother of God and All Her Wacky Nephews (Mal)  
> 14 - Shee-niou -- Cow Sucking  
> 15 - Go tsao de – dog fucking

**Author's Note:**

> In my Extra Cargo ‘verse I see Caroline already having done a couple of tea lessons with Inara. So it occurs after the extra ficlet “When She Was Good (Chapter 1).” Also this was written as a challenge fic to use all of the cuss words used in the article (take out the spaces) www.toplessrobot. com/2010/11/fireflys_15_best _uses _of _chinese _profanity.php So this chapter uses four out of the fifteen best uses of Chinese profanity.
> 
> Ai ya – Damn  
> 1 - Bun tyen-shung duh ee-dway-ro. Stupid Inbred Stack of Meat (Simon)  
> 2 - Ching-wah tsao duh liou mahng! Frog-Humping Son of a Bitch! (Jayne)  
> 3 - Fay-fay duh pee yen -- A baboon’s asshole (Jayne)  
> Lǎoshī -- Teacher  
> Nian qing de -- Young one  
> Pianzhe de - Stubborn  
> Pi gu -- Ass  
> 4 - Shiong mao niao -- Panda Piss (Caroline)  
> Tóufǎ de gǒu – Hair of the dog  
> Yu ben de -- Stupid


End file.
